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My husband and I got married with high hopes. We were in love, wanted a family, and enjoyed being together. I knew my husband had been deployed when he was in the military. After his stint in the service, he also went to Afghanistan as a contract employee as well. He saw and experienced some terrible things, but he didn’t really like to talk about it. All this happened before we got together, so even though I was proud of him, I didn’t think too much about it. We soon became parents to two beautiful little girls. But by then, our relationship was getting rocky.
My husband grew increasingly irritable, short-tempered, and hypervigilant. Noises bothered him. I was vaguely familiar with PTSD in veterans and wondered if this could be it. But I didn’t know what to do or how to help. He did not want to take medicines. He was not interested in therapy. Our home life became more and more tense. I felt like I was walking on eggshells all the time. Eventually, I became depressed. I didn’t even feel like myself anymore. I started going to counseling for myself, but nothing really helped. I felt like I kept hitting a wall. I’m a pretty strong person, yet I got to the point of asking, “How can I keep doing this?” I waited until I was thirty-one to get married. I expected to be happily married for life. Now things didn’t look at all like I thought they would look.
Then last year a friend, who I knew was a strong believer, shared that she had discovered CBD oil. I knew nothing about it. I didn’t know if it got people high. I had no idea what kind of effects it had or what it could do for people. I just knew I could trust my friend. She encouraged me to do my own research on CBD oil.
So I did.
When I put the words “CBD oil” and “PTSD” in a search engine, so much came up. I was intrigued and started reading everything I could find. A few months later, I went on my annual “sister trip” with five of my closest friends. We have been friends since we were freshmen in college, and we try to go somewhere together each year. Three of them have master’s degrees in counseling and two are practicing counselors. All of them are very soul-giving. That is their lens. I love and respect them, and we speak into each other’s lives. On that summer trip, they could tell I was not myself. I am usually happy and sarcastic, laughing and telling stories. I love my job and my family. But this time, they could instantly see something was wrong, and I didn’t have the energy to fake it. My friends could see how down I was. I was sad all the time. My emotions lived close to the surface.
One night over dinner, I took the plunge and asked my friends if they had heard of CBD oil. I told them I had been looking into it and thought I was going to try it. They were very encouraging.
When I went home to Texas, my mind was made up. I told my husband that we were going to try CBD oil. Period. I thought if I told him I would do it with him, he would agree. I really didn’t think it was for me. I wanted it to “cure” his PTSD. I was just going along so he would comply. In Texas, CBD oil is still very limited. I know that some states sell it on every corner, but not here. I researched and found three shops within 90 minutes of my house where I could buy it legally, but even then I thought you had to have a prescription. I also found a store over the Oklahoma border. I knew it could be ordered online too. But my research taught me it is very important to get good quality oil. You can’t just buy the cheapest CBD oil on Amazon and think it is going to do anything. I found the one I wanted, bought a bottle of CBD oil on a Tuesday, brought it home, and we went for it.
We each put five drops under our tongues, waited ninety seconds and swallowed. We took it in the morning and repeated this routine at night. Then I waited for a miracle. Nothing obvious happened that day, but by Thursday, I had an epiphany. I had not cried in two days. Now, that may not seem like much, but I had been crying at some point every day for months. Daily, something would push me over the edge. My emotions were so raw, and I was so tired.
Just two days after I started taking CBD oil, I felt like I started taking things less personally. I felt like I could get a grasp on my life again. I was floored by that. I didn’t feel different in a weird way. It helped me feel like myself again. My circumstances didn’t change. It wasn’t a miracle. But it was another tool in my family’s toolbox for healing.
Once I experienced this difference that I could not deny, I knew I had to share CBD oil. As a teacher, I knew the first step had to be education. So many people are misinformed about CBD oil or scared to try it because they don’t understand what it is and what it does. Others are jumping at the chance to try CBD oil, but they may not realize they must do the legwork to make sure they are getting a high quality oil.
My passion today is sharing about CBD oil and how it brings health without a high. It helped me, and I believe it can help you too!
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